Ebb and Flow: Transference, Presence, and Oneness
By Amir Ramezani, Nsa Emodi, Jeanette Vuong, Maria S. Montero, Alex L. Andrade Jr., and Daniel Rockers
Introduction:
A group of professionals and students reflected on our experiences of the psychoanalytic concept of transference and the meditation concept of presence and oneness. We wrote about these concepts from our own perspective. We used poetry to express our experience of these ideas. Please note that the following poem uses the word transference in a broad manner, including referring to 1) the client’s transference, 2) the therapist’s countertransference, and 3) the therapist's transference.
Image credit: Amir Ramezani, copyright 2024.
Image description: two intertwined faces in profile surrounded by golden circle.
When I am fully present, I seek unity within,
feel a just world begin
to embrace,
Where every being’s soul
finds a welcoming place.
The masks and identity laid on to me by society dissipates,
boundaries fade,
A common humanity and overlapping essence
With all being begins.
In this presence, I connect with my transference,
An inner route that knows how to project my past to now,
Identities blend, divisions grow thin.
But with a mindful presence that sooth
I can arrive to a connected a kin
Who carries me to my inner truth.
I explore this inner sea
Of oneness and transference merge to create me and a bigger “we”
In the midst of understanding my transference and presence reflection,
I find the essence of human connection.
Casting our net into the sea, fishing for the who’s, when’s, and why’s,
Memories bubble to the surface, clouding the depths,
One stares at their reflection and turns to the Other,
The Other continues fishing, searching.
Being One or the Other at sea, can we flow together?
Let's look up to the skies and check the weather.
If your drops of pain rain down on our boat,
Do you think we will sink or float?
In our alliance, I’ll be like the mermaid on the bow,
While presence shines like a light aglow.
You steer at the helm of unchartered water.
I’m here for you like mami wata’s daughter.
Bolstered by spirits of the sea to hold deep space,
Your secrets, sha
me, and fears transform with grace.
Did you even imagine there could be such transmutation?
Making peace with what is, a simple revelation.
Send your paper boat with wishes out to sea,
As we learn to sit with it and just be.
As I walked through life, I left parts of myself behind
Without awareness, without consciousness
I withered a little at a time.
Suddenly, a faint echo of loneliness called to me.
I ignored it, but it grew deeper.
I heard you.
I heard you calling me to get you.
I made a halting stop.
Looked back.
But I couldn’t see you.
I could hear you.
But I could not see you.
The echo of your absence grew stronger.
You couldn’t just let me go.
I learned to listen.
Ever so closely
With curiosity
After all, you couldn’t possibly hurt me
Deep down I knew you loved me.
And so, when I finally listened, you guided me.
Until I found all parts of me.
Oh, what a wonderful feeling to be ONE at once.
Where had I felt this sense before?
Was Gendlin right?
Could it be a door?
In this space, I speak and share for progression forward
Without invitation, the feelings of the past creep in
I seem shakily me and familiar in my sense of frailness
I trust in your guidance and the connection we have built
You are solid and supportive, I feel you feel me slide out of now
You remind me of how my sensitivity is my strength
And that while my past might influence my present
I am now, not then
And I can be present in both without the fear
I progress through the regress
And become the more fuller me
I was always meant to be
About the poets
Amir Ramezani, Ph.D.: As an artist on the inside, and a psychologist, teacher, and community organizer on the outside, I engage in the creative process simply to express and allow ideas to grow, in hopes to help people and society. My background in guitar, painting, poetry, and humor helps me to keep grounded. I simply enjoy seeing people take in creativity, heal, and make contact with the abstract.
Alex L. Andrede Jr., Psy.D.: At this point in my career as a psychologist, I have been able to explore my creative side through writing articles/newsletters and hosting my podcast (Psychology Plus). Poetry has been included in these ventures at different times. This poem felt like another opportunity to share the vulnerability that individuals experience as part of the therapeutic process. It represented an opportunity to share that while patients might be the ones disclosing information about themselves, they are not the only ones feeling things during the session.
Daniel M. Rockers, Ph.D.: I am Daniel Rockers. My passion is new ideas and new ways of thinking. I get this from poetry, puzzles, baking, brewing, languages and building stone walls. Somewhere in there I am also a psychologist!
Jeanette Vuong Young: Jeannette is a student who’s intrigued by nature and the human psyche. I prefer my art concise, in digestible bites, allowing the viewer to feel and react then and there.
Maria Montero, Psy.D.: I have taken notice of my creative side when I’m deep in my thoughts. I have always scribbled in a notebook, written phrases without an ending that eventually unfold into something creative, usually a short poem. As a recent psychology graduate, I have felt a peeling of layers as I’m confronted with the very question, “who are you?” and “what do you really want?” I suspect these existential questions come up for all humanity as we try to make sense of all of it. It is during these times that I yearn for a way to express my experience. The creative side of me seeks a pencil and paper to write my thoughts, not always but sometimes resulting in a poem.
Nsa Emodi: Nsa Emodi is a Nigerian-American yogi, psychologist in training, and lover of life. Writing has always been an artistic medium for her since she was a young girl and now it helps her express the intangible inner feelings with words. Her contribution to the poem includes an ode to West African spirituality and the depth of healing that is possible.
For questions and comments about this poem, contact Amir at ramezani.amir@gmail.com.